Minsan na bang nawala ang iyong stapler,
ballpen, post-it, or pagkain sa pantry
tapos biglang sasabihin sa atin:
“Ay sorry, akala ko walang may ari.”
“Ibabalik ko naman, nakalimutan lang.”
Bigla na lang ba nawawala ang iyong damit,
make up, o bag sa cabinet and only to find out,
gamit na pala ng kapatid mo?
Eh yung pagkain na matagal mong pinag-ipunan,
halimbawa yung paborito mong chocolate
o chichirya na minsan mo lang bilhin kasi mahal,
tapos malaman laman mo, naubos na nila?
Another kind of scenario ay yung
pilit nating gustong matapos ang ating trabaho,
pero may kaopisina tayong non stop
chumika at makipagdaldalan?
Nakakainis ‘di ba?
I once remembered may nagkwento sa akin.
Naiiyak siya sa galit nung nawala
yung cheetos jalapeno na tinipid tipid niyang kainin!
“Grabe naman cheetos lang eh.”
“Ang babaw naman non!”
It MIGHT seem that way,
pero para sa ating mga biglang nawawalan
ng gamit, pagkain, at personal space,
this can also be serious especially
if it happens ALL THE TIME.
So what do we do with this?
BE FIRM THAT IT-IS-YOURS space
(Photo from this Link)
Hindi naman tayo magdadamot,
kasi kung gusto naman nila, 100%
hindi tayo magdadalawang isip na
magbigay o magpahiram.
But until then,
they need to know that someone owns it.
Or else baka akalain nilang
okay lang na kunin nila ng kunin.
We will be gentle as we can be naman.
“Friend, akin yata yang nadampot mo.”
“Papahiramin naman kita, paalam ka lang.”
“Next time if you want magdadala na lang ako ng extra.”
Para sa susunod, matututo na silang umilag
at magtanong muna lalo na
sa mga bagay na hindi sa kanila.
Mas magiging conscious na sila.
BE HONEST TO THE PERSON space
(Photo from this Link)
Alam n’yo yung instant reaction natin
kapag may nangingialam ng ating gamit?
“!@#$%^! Sino gumalaw ng chocolate ko??”
“Pag hindi ka umamin lagot ka sa ‘kin!”
“Hay nako, wala ng ginawa kundi makialam.”
“Kainis nandito na naman ‘tong daldalerang ito.”
I get it, we are pissed enough to
even talk to the person ng maayos.
But you see, wala naman magagawa
ang parinig natin.
It might be misunderstood too
at mas lalo lang lumaki yung problema.
So the solution? TALK TO THEM.
Let them know how hurt you are
or kung gaano ka na kaapektado
sa ginagawa nila sa ‘yo.
Right timing lang para hindi magkasakitan
at lumabas ang tamang words sa ating bibig.
CREATE A BOUNDARY space
(Photo from this Link)
Kung meron tayong ayaw na magalaw o
makita ng iba, itago na lang natin ng maayos
at huwag pakalat kalat.
Kung ayaw natin na naiistorbo
habang nagtatrabaho o nag-aaral,
we can close our doors or
make a note outside na we don’t want
to be disturbed in the meantime.
Kung ayaw nating may tawag ng tawag
during Sunday since it’s family day,
inform them ahead para we can turn
off our phones on that day.
Minsan kasi may mga taong maaaring
hindi naiintindihan ang personal space,
or minsan hindi makuha yung hints natin.
So tayo na mismo ang gumawa ng paraan
para mas maintindihan nila at masanay
sila na respituhin kung anong meron tayo
at kung anong gusto natin mangyari.
“Kapag hindi sa atin, magpaalam at huwag basta kunin.
Kapag busy naman sila, huwag muna bulabugin.
Respect their personal space upang tayo naman ay respituhin din.”
THINK. REFLECT. APPLY.
- Minsan na bang na violate ang iyong space?
- Sa paanong paraan?
- Paano mo sasabihin na hindi naman nakasasakit ng kapwa?
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Chinkee Tan is a Wealth Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Best-selling Author on personal finance and wealth management. He has written 16 best-selling books and counting. His mission is to equip millions of Filipinos to be free from financial stress & experience financial freedom.